Don’t end up in a body bag this Valentine’s Day or ever. Sometimes I trust people too much not suspecting that they’re harmless at all and assuming that they just want to be friends. There were a lot of close calls when I probably could’ve been really hurt.

One time there was a guy who was in some of my computer courses at a university for a year or two. We would help each other with homework. Later on, we did not have any of the same classes for a year or so. One day, we ran into each other and he said that we should hang out sometime. I said sure, thinking this guy seems cool, we could be buddies. We exchanged numbers.

He called and wanted to hang out on a Sunday. I had a friend over hanging out with my roommate and asked if he’d like to join us. He said “Nah” and instead wanted to hang out at his apartment. He said something about his apartment smelling really bad, from either accidentally burning something or painting something (I can’t remember at the moment), but that it should be OK.

Not hanging out with him before (except in class), and considering that his apartment was off campus, I didn’t really want to go all the way there. So I suggested a Mexican restaurant/bar that usually had a live band. So we walked there, but it was closed. I thought to myself. Dang! I was out of ideas and he kept suggesting his apartment that it was only a few minutes away. So finally I gave in.

I hopped in his car and he drove me through the woods that had no street lights, as if it was something of the Blair Witch projects. At that point I was pretty creeped out and thought maybe this is a mistake. He had to stop at some random gas station which was also in the middle of the woods somewhere. I sat there thinking, if anything I would whip out my karate, but he seemed harmless… He was a much taller very built guy though.

So we just hung out at his apartment, in which the conversation went from dead to really bizarre. He started asking me how much I weigh and my pants size. At that point, shortly after, I got myself out of the situation and asked him to drive me back. Luckily I came back in one piece.

The next few day was really bizarre because I received drunk phone calls from him, as explained in another post, Drunk Dial. The night after, when he apologized, he confessed his feelings via IM.  I was pretty shocked and surprised (considering how clueless I can be), but kindly said that I didn’t feel the same way and genuinely hoped that he would find someone someday who felt the same way. His response was “If you’re not interested in a relationship, but interested in a physical relationship, I wouldn’t mind that either. I just want someone to cuddle with, watch a movie with, and be physical…” I kindly declined. At that point, he got really upset and made stabs at me, writing things like, I’m “not the hottest girl around” and that there are a line of girls at this moment that want him, that he could get right now. Then ended with, “Bye. Have a nice life.” I responded “You too. Bye.”

That night, I was shocked and couldn’t believe he suggested that.  Also, everything replayed in my head, the signs I should have noticed, and questions of what if he got aggressive like that in the car or at the apartment or in the woods? I could have easily ended up in a body bag, buried in the woods somewhere, (if he was actually a killer), and no one would know. I don’t think he was a killer; he did however, seem very harmless and acknowledged the fact that he was afraid of me because of my martial arts training, so maybe that saved me.

But next time, if you were me, try to get to know someone before agreeing to a ride in someone’s car, in the middle of nowhere woods, and into someone’s apartment.  I guess I already did the years I knew him in classes and so I trusted him.  But I’m saying this for both women and men anyways, not just women. I seriously thought that he wanted to be just friends. But then again, I think that about almost every guy.

I try to be more aware of my situation now and have to force myself to assume that sometimes people want to be more than friends. Not to say that if you get to know someone, that you’re automatically safe. I heard that most murder cases are not random or from strangers, but someone that is close or knows them well. Not to scare you.

My friend said ages ago, that she got a ride home from a kids’ clown entertainer.  Turns out, she found out he was a serial killer who chopped people up, put them in a lime bag (bag full of limes), and buried them in his basement.  He got away with it for so long but later on got caught.  Luckily, nothing happened to her and she was pretty shocked to find that out because he seemed absolutely harmless, (he worked with kids after all).

Just..be careful. Be street smart, be safe and try not to end up in a body bag!!!